Christian courtship according to the Holy Bible

Being a Christian brings with it many doubts about how to live at work, in marriage or in Christian courtship. Through this article you will know what is Christian courtship according to the Holy Bible? And what are the bases to keep it in harmony?

christian-courtship2

christian courtship

When we surrender our existence to Almighty God, changes occur in our lifestyle that are made by the way we serve the Lord. We, the believers of the Gospel of Jesus, are the ones who believe that God became man and came to Earth to save us by being crucified on the Cross of Calvary for each one of our sins.

As Christians we make the decision to fulfill each one with his commandments, we study his Sacred Word, we imitate him in every way. So when we get to have a christian courtship, we must remember the Path that God wants us to travel.

Acts 11:26

26 And they met there a whole year with the church, and taught many people; and the disciples were first called Christians at Antioch

When we decide to have a Christian courtship, we must remember that before anything there is Christ and that He must be the center of our world, our universe and our reason for Being. That is why we Christians are so different in the world, because we we shed all that we are to become a new creature.

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Christians before courtship

Before starting a relationship it is of the utmost importance that you learn to know who you are. Many of us spend our lives surrounded by people and do not have time to think about Who are we? What we want? And where do we go?

These questions are essential that we find out before trying to start a relationship. Thanks to the fact that not being clear about this can bring us problems, since we do not really know each other.

It's important to remember that when you're in a committed relationship, you're putting another person's feelings at risk. That is why we must define our emotional, social and personal stability well to establish a Christian courtship.

To define this, you can ask yourself several questions such as, Am I really ready to have a relationship? Does God want me to start a relationship right now? Do I have time between my obligations to start a relationship?

These and other questions can be answered with a lot of self-criticism and in constant prayer to God. Remember that deciding to be with someone is not something for moments or at times, it is perseverance, dedication, and a lot of understanding and love.

We must take into consideration different elements before starting a courtship, to strengthen our Christian roots.

  • Brothers of faith:

Surrounding ourselves with brothers who promulgate the Christian Faith is very helpful. Since they provide us with different advice always within moral beliefs and Faith. Having Christ as our center within a group of friends is very helpful since everyone will walk the same path and will be very helpful to each other.

  • Christians committed to Jesus

One of the things that we must understand and accept as Christians is that we cannot be with all the people around us. This applies in personal life, work, friendships, or people with whom we believe to formalize a Christian courtship.

2 Corintios 6: 14

14 Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers; for what companionship does justice have with injustice? And what communion has light with darkness?

This reality that Paul teaches us is something that we must apply in any aspect of our lives. This is because if we are children of God, we must make everyone around us Christian to follow in the ways of Jesus.

If we maintain friendships or any relationship with people who do not share our beliefs, they will probably incite us to sin, since they live in the flesh and not in the spirit as we do.

christian courtship

Christ lives in me

When we declare ourselves Christians it does not mean anything more than saying that we believe that Christ saved us on the Cross of Calvary. We Christians, by declaring God as our Savior, must make a transformation in our lives that makes us new creatures. Making Christ the center of our new life.

The Lord knows which are each one of the weaknesses that we have as human beings and which are the sins that each one of us has. That is why he constantly calls us to approach the Cross of Calvary so that we have a reconformation in the spirit that helps us keep our Christian courtship in the best place.

Galata 2: 20

20 I am crucified with Christ, and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me; and what I now live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.

Although it is difficult for us to accept the unconditional love that God has for each one of us. It is important to remember and assimilate it since thanks to Him I am saved. And for that reason we must put him at the center of each of our lives to worship and praise him as only he deserves.

This centralization of our life arises from the fact that we have been witnesses of the goodness of the Lord with us. We know that there is no better Father than He who paid the price for each one of us. God calls us constantly at all times and in every place, that is why we must listen to his voice, within so many problems to see His glory in our lives and the wonderful transformation that will be made in our lives in the powerful name of the Lord Jesus, in our Christian courtship.

Christian courtship: do we need a life partner?

In today's world we can see the media bombardment that is experienced with "perfect" relationships and that makes it generate a certain need for life partners to recreate those moments. The first thing we have to take into consideration is that social networks are a curtain that looms over the perfect moment. We cannot get carried away by what is described as perfection. The only perfect person who was on Earth was Jesus of Nazareth, we as Christians try to resemble Him but it is hard for us.

If we read the Bible we realize that the Lord, although he spoke to us in many ways about love and how it should be handled with others and in marriage, shows practically nothing about courtship.

Being single does not mean that we fail in one aspect of our lives, on the contrary, we can get to know ourselves better, we know what we like and what we dislike. We understand the importance of solitude and the time we can dedicate to God is of quality.

We understand that the social pressure that we must find a partner, stabilize ourselves and get married to meet the moral demands that society has of us is normal. However, if we analyze and learn the Holy Scriptures, Jesus teaches us that there are people who were born with the so-called gift of abstinence. This is because the Lord wants these people to fill their need for a relationship with Him.

Mattheww 7:7-8

10 His disciples said to him: If this is the condition of a man with his wife, it is not appropriate to marry.

11 Then he said to them: Not everyone is able to receive this, but those to whom it is given.

12 For there are eunuchs who were born like this from their mother's womb, and there are eunuchs who are made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Whoever is able to receive this, let him receive it.

christian courtship

The reason for the courtship

Wanting to find a partner is perfect, as long as we do it respecting our beliefs and not endangering our relationship with God. We must understand that as Christians we do not belong to this world and our way of being is completely different from others.

When we are Christians and we are looking for a courtship, we must look for an ideal partner that complements us and we can form a family together. That is why it is of the utmost importance that we get to know the person well before entering into a more formal relationship.

Proverbs 18: 22

22 He who finds a wife finds good,
And attain the benevolence of Jehovah.

Start by being friends, share knowledge and places that make you know each other and understand each other as individuals. We clearly know that over time people show themselves as they are, that is why it is of the utmost importance to take the time to enjoy getting to know each other.

It is important that you have a constant communion with God, thus managing to keep your new life projects in prayer. We must remember that the Almighty Lord is in control of every aspect of our lives and that we must hand over each friend or candidate to Him to begin a new life journey.

Aspects to consider in courtship

When meeting someone who attracts us to start our life as a couple, we must take into consideration several important aspects for us Christians. Which are:

  • first friends

Although it sounds poetic or something of history, knowing each other as friends is essential for a relationship to grow with good foundations of understanding and understanding, it is necessary to consolidate the friendship phase. We must remember that in the Holy Scriptures we are exhorted that the couple we decide to be our husband or wife is forever.

  • Couple Beginnings

Meeting someone who maintains your beliefs, respects you, and bonds of affinity are created can give indications of a courtship. At this point we must be clear that the first six months is a phase of total admiration, aggrandizement of feeling and affection at its best.

  • marriage at the door

After dating for a while, it is normal for the next step to be marriage. It is important to always remember that our goal is to fulfill the Lord's designs. For this reason we must understand that marriage is forever and it is a step that must be taken thinking about all the things that this implies. And not make the decision for something of the moment or social pressure.

Grooms committed to God

When we meet that special person to formalize the courtship, we must be stronger in Christianity. It will begin the carnal temptations that can jeopardize our relationship with God. The commitment of both must be to respect the Lord's commandments and to please Him so that their relationship is blessed by Him at all times.

1 Corinthians 6: 18-20

18 Flee fornication. Any other sin that man commits is outside the body; but he who fornicates sins against his own body.

19 Or do you ignore that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, which is in you, which you have from God, and that you are not your own?

20 For you have been bought with a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God's.

Therefore, we must avoid falling into situations that could jeopardize our desire to walk in the path of the Lord. Let's avoid staying alone, in places like cars or cars which can be the beginning of a life in sin.

We should not feel ashamed if we make the decision not to be intimate with our partners, on the contrary, it should be a reason for admiration since we are respecting God's love before anything else.

Not all who call themselves Christians are.

We know that there are relationships that progress quickly through friendship, courtship and end in a wonderful marriage. However, it is not the common denominator, so we must have as an alarm signal people who want to have a more advanced relationship than the one we can offer.

A very common example is relationships with very marked age differences. What happens is that one of the two has completely natural expectations as children, and the other person must be focused on, for example, a bigger house. It is important to understand that we must burn stages and that we must live experiences respecting God's mandates, but growing as individuals.

If you feel that you are in a relationship like the ones that are known as toxic, that you feel that they cut off your space, that they fight at every moment, that they do not respect your beliefs or ideologies, the best thing is to walk away and not let the Christian courtship continue since It can bring as consequences the estrangement with our Lord Jesus Christ.

Something that we must understand is that not all those who call themselves Christians are. So if you met him in a church group and this person is not afraid of God, he will make you fall into sin, so we must be in constant communication with the Lord.

Ten commandments of a Christian courtship

We already defined what is christian courtship so we will leave a list of ten commandments that we must apply in our relationship to be a couple that enjoys the grace of the Lord and that is an example for their community and those around them.

  1. You will love God above all things

This is one of the ten commandments found in the Holy Scriptures. And that should be the center of our lives as Christians. When establishing a Christian courtship we must make sure that our center is and will be God Almighty. We must be careful not to create an adoration of our partner and take our eyes off our Savior Jesus Christ.

Exodus 20: 3-5

You can not have others gods in front of me.

You will not make an image of yourself, or any likeness of what is in heaven above, or on earth below, or in the waters under the earth.

You will not bow to them, nor honor them; For I am Jehovah your God, strong, jealous, who visited the wickedness of parents on children up to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me,

That is why we must be very careful how we handle or express the affection of our partner to avoid going against the Lord's designs.

  1. The goal of both should be marriage

Every Christian dating relationship should be for the sole purpose of marriage. That is why an equal yoke must be sought for the facilitation of the Lord's desires. When we Christians make the decision to start a relationship, it is because we have gone through the friendship phase in a correct and pleasing way in the sight of the Lord.

christian courtship

  1. you will not fornicate

This is one of the sins that the Lord hates the most and that is why in the Holy Scriptures the mandate is clear.

Matthew 15: 19

19 Because bad thoughts, homicides, adulteries, fornication, thefts, false testimonies, blasphemies come from the heart.

We must understand that even if we have intercourse with our future husband the night before the wedding, it is an act that God abhors and condemns. That is why as Christians we must stay on the path marked by Jesus, we know that it is not easy.

  1. avoid loneliness

One of the things that we must avoid within a Christian courtship is to stay alone with our partner. This makes the temptation of contact that is not pleasing to the Lord more real. Avoid creating plans that can put you in a position where you can tempt and fall into the desire of the flesh.

  1. Respect

One of the fundamental bases within any relationship, including that of Christian courtship, is respect. This is one of the values ​​that should be applied most in our intrapersonal relationships. We must consider that if we are in a courtship and you begin to appreciate flashes of disrespect, unfortunately it is not healthy to continue with that relationship since you are starting a relationship that mostly ends in failure.

  1. Communication

Another of the fundamental bases in the relationship is communication. You should talk and get to know each other through this tool. There are sensitive issues such as perhaps a complicated childhood, or some event that traumatized us, which can cause our relationship to begin to have different types of problems thanks to issues not discussed at the time. God, respect, love and communication must be your fundamental pillars in a Christian courtship.

  1. The finances

When Christian dating leads to a marriage, the couple must agree on a savings plan. This will help us throughout the marriage relationship, thanks to the fact that the conversations of savings, expenses and plans help what is the formation of a home and the early family. To obtain better results in economic matters, clear communication is necessary on how you want to handle finances at home and prepare a plan of accounts, expenses and savings.

  1. Christian courtship help

As human beings, we have a hard time asking for help. However, we Christians have learned that without the help of Almighty God we can do absolutely nothing without his guidance. So when deciding to establish a Christian dating relationship it is very helpful to have a mentor or a mature Christian to receive advice on certain issues in relationships.

To make this work, the dating couple must be completely honest with the mentor. Since it is the only way they have to get advice that can really help them and guide them on the path that will lead them to Christian marriage.

  1. meet the families

One of the first things that must be done to have a Christian courtship is the official introduction to the families of our couples. With this step, several factors are achieved, such as formalizing the relationship and seeing the environment that surrounds your partner.

Just as God urges us not to be unequally yoked, we must understand that just as we must look for someone who shares our beliefs. We must find one that shares the same human values ​​and more or less drives in the same lifestyle with respect to Sunday activities, church attendance, concerts, sermons, events, among others.

  1. expectations about the future

As human beings we always imagine a future that for the most part can be thought of as unreal or even fanciful. That is why when in Christian courtship the plans for the future are raised, they must be based on the reality that surrounds them.

They must be plans that fit their budgets, the number of children they want, how often they will visit the family, where they want to live, if they want dogs or cats. All these conversations will avoid having discussions later thanks to the fact that they clarified each of these aspects.

As we have understood, having a courtship within Christian beliefs is not easy, but it is not impossible. It is a relationship that if carried out in the best way we can build a courtship and then a marriage based on the fear of God, respect, communication and understanding. raise your prayer for request  for God to give you strength.

The first thing you should remember is that we are not perfect, each one has their mistakes and we must learn to handle these things since later we will be able to consider them of greater importance.

Let's look for a partner who will help us strengthen our love and our relationship with God. A couple that helps us walk the path that Jesus left us marked. May it be a life partner that helps us grow in every way. Let him be our counselor, ideal help in this world where evil is becoming more and more notorious.

And when we find that ideal partner, we thank God every day for listening to our prayers, for sending us a partner that complements us and with whom we will shape our lives under the divine grace of God. And with the certainty that it is a relationship that is blessed since we have lived in his Word and complied with each of his commandments so that we may be pleasing to God.

To continue with the presence of the Lord and how we can give our life as a couple to Him, we invite you to read help prayer for those moments where we believe that we have lost everything with our partner. Let us remember that God is in control.

On the other hand, we leave you this video that will help you in the same way about Christian courtship


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  1.   Luis Fernando Lopez placeholder image said

    Blessings, beloved brothers, I congratulate you for this beautiful study based on the word of God, which is and will be very useful for many young people who are on their way to the altar, to commit themselves to
    The Lord our God. keep going atte Partor Luigui from Guatemala.

  2.   Yamilet said

    Very good comment about courtship… I would like to understand why it is a sin to be intimate with the boyfriend who has been chosen as the couple to be his partner until death do us part… if there is a healthy and blessed relationship, why would it be fornication? And if both couples have already had a previous life and want to start over with another, that would still be adultery or fornication?
    I apologize but it is very difficult to understand how to lead a relationship that pleases God...