¿Indlela yokuyeka ukuthathar? Kungumkhwa abantu abaninzi abafuna ukuwususa kubomi babo kwaye kubangela iingxaki ezininzi, kweli nqaku siza kukunika iingcebiso, ungaphoswa.
Kubalulekile ukufuna uncedo xa uzama Ukuyeka njani ukusela?
Indlela yokuyeka ukusela?
Yonke le nto iqala ngesiselo esilula okanye isiselo esilula ukwazi okanye ukuba nomdla malunga nencasa yolunye uhlobo lwesiselo. Abanye baqala kuba befuna nje ukwazi ukuba kunjani ukuba neebhiya ezimbalwa, ezinye iwhiskeys okanye ukuziva unamandla, ukufuna ukwazi kuba yinto eqhelekileyo, njengoko ixesha lihamba iba ngumkhwa.
Kancinci kancinci esi senzo siyakhula kwaye kwakheka indlela yokuziphatha, okonyusa ukuphindaphindeka kunye nesingqi sokusela utywala, umntu uthethelela nasiphi na isenzo sentlalo okanye isenzo nje sokusinxulumanisa notywala. Ngale ndlela, kumiselwa indlela yokuphila apho ngokuthe ngcembe ziye zibe yinxalenye yobomi, apho isixa esikhulu sotywala sisiselwa ngeveki nangemihla ngemihla.
Iingxaki ziqala kwaye amalungu entsapho ayabandezeleka, imitshato iyaphela, imisebenzi iyaphela, kwanobuhlobo buyahlukana. Ekugqibeleni umntu uba yingxaki kwaye kwiimeko ezininzi udala iimeko ezingathandekiyo kangangokuba angamvumeli nokuba amncede, lixesha lokukhangela indlela yokuyeka utywala?
Gcwalisa ulwazi olukweli nqaku ngokufunda olu lwazi lulandelayo oluvela kweli khonkco ulawulo lwempembelelo apho imiba ebalulekileyo ichazwe ngokweenkcukacha.
Isigqibo
Imeko iba nzima, abantu bade bafune unyango ngokwasengqondweni okanye olunye unyango ukunciphisa umonakalo obangelwa butywala kwabanye abantu. Iingcali zicinga ukuba akulula ukusingatha ezi meko, izigulana ezikwimeko emaxongo zisebenzisana kancinane kakhulu nonyango, abanye abayinikeli kubaluleka into yokuba baphulukene nosapho, imisebenzi kunye nabahlobo.
Ukuphunyezwa konyango okanye uncedo lokukwazi ukuseka indlela yokuyeka ukusela kuphela isigqibo somntu. Namhlanje kunzima ukwenza esi sigqibo, ingakumbi kubantu abaye baneengxaki ezinzulu zokusela; Ukukhotyokiswa butywala yenye yezona ngxaki zinzima ezikhoyo kuluntu lwanamhlanje.
Amanani azwenibanzi kwiingxaki ezizibangelayo ayothusa, nangona kunjalo abasemagunyeni baye bathabatha amanyathelo aqatha kangangeminyaka emininzi, kodwa kukho umdla wezoqoqosho ovumela ukuphelisa le ngxaki.
Iphunyezwa njani?
Iingcali zengqondo zineendlela ezininzi ezinokuthi zinikezele kwiinxila kwaye, kuxhomekeke kuhlobo lwemeko, zihlala ziphunyezwa ngokuqwalasela indawo yentlalo apho zisebenza khona. Kukwakholelwa ukuba abahlobo nentsapho bafanele babandakanyeke ukuze kunikelwe ezinye iindlela neembono ezinokunceda umguli.
Ngaloo ndlela, siya kubona ngezantsi ezinye iingcebiso ezinokuthi zisetyenziswe ukuzama ukuphendula umbuzo we Indlela yokuyeka ukusela ngonaphakade?, enokusetyenziswa kwizalamane okanye kubahlobo abasenyongweni abathwaxwa yile ngxaki. Siqala ngoko:
ingxaki yokwamkelwa
Linyathelo lokuqala ekufuneka wonke umntu alithathe ukuqalisa inkqubo yokulinganisa kunye nokuphelisa umkhwa. Abantu abanxilisayo bahlelwa ngokwamanqanaba, umntu ngamnye onengxaki yokusela ugqalwa njengomntu oselayo xa ekugqibeleni enomkhwa wokusela naluphi na uhlobo lwesiselo esinxilisayo.
Abaninzi bacinga ukuba xa sithetha ngekhoboka lotywala, sichaza umntu onxila yonke imihla kwaye kufuneka asele uhlobo oluthile lotywala ukuze azive onwabile. Olu luvo lububuxoki ngokupheleleyo; Ikhoboka lotywala ngumntu othi, ngenxa yaso nasiphi na isizathu okanye imeko, asele utywala ukuze anelise inkanuko okanye intswelo ethile.
Inqanaba lokuqala ke libandakanya ukuqaphela ukuba ungumthengi wotywala, ukuze kudalwe iingcinga engqondweni yakhe apho kubonwa imeko engaqhelekanga. Esi simo sengqondo linyathelo elibaluleke kakhulu lokuqalisa ukukhangela inkxaso kunye nokuseka indlela yokuyeka ukusela; Ukusuka apho, kufuneka kusekwe amacebo avumela umntu ukuba aphile ngokupheleleyo.
Balaselisa izinto ezintle
Isinyathelo sesibini sibandakanya ukugxininisa kwiinzuzo zokuyeka ukusela utywala, kufuneka uzame ukukhuthaza kumntu, iimeko apho eqala ukukhangela amaxesha obomi obuhlukeneyo obuzisa ukwaneliseka. Xa kusithiwa: “ukuyeka ukusela kuzisa izibonelelo”, isenzo esingaphaya kwamava omntu xa esela utywala sibekwa ngasentla.
Ukubaluleka kweli nyathelo kukwazisa umntu ukuba amaqhinga kunye namaxesha okuyeka ukusela kufuneka abhekiswe phi. Kubalulekile ukubazisa ukuba kutheni ufuna ukuyeka ukusela okanye ukunciphisa, okuya kuvumela umntu ukuba abeke ipateni eyahlukileyo yembono yakhe malunga notywala.
Uluhlu ke lwenziwe ngeenzuzo zexesha elizayo eziza nokuyeka ukusela. Kule meko, unokukhankanya iimeko ezinjengalezi: Ukudlala ngokuphandle nabantwana bakho, ukufumana imbeko kubahlobo nabantu osebenza nabo, ukonwabela iincoko ezinzulu nezibangela umdla ngakumbi, ukonga imali nokungayichithi ngeziselo.
Iingxaki zolu hlobo zinokuqondwa ngakumbi ukuba ufunda inqaku i-amotivational syndrome Iimbono ezibalulekileyo zivakaliswa apho ezinokunceda ukusombulula ezi meko.
irejista yokusela
Sisicwangciso esiyingozi kakhulu kodwa xa sisebenza, siba sisixhobo esisebenzayo sokuyeka ukusela. Isebenza ngolu hlobo lulandelayo: Umhla kunye nexesha apho iglasi yotywala kufuneka isele ibhalwe kwincwadana, kwiphepha elifanayo kubhalwe inani leeglasi, kunye nohlobo lotywala.
Iirekhodi zale mali zigcinwa yonke imihla, kunye nokuziphatha okufuneka kuqhutywe kwimeko yokusela utywala obunjalo; Umntu uya kuqwalasela umthamo kunye nokuziphatha yonke imihla ngokufunda idatha ebhalwe kwincwadana okanye kwincwadana.
Kancinci kancinci, uqala ukujonga kwaye amisele umboniso omncinci kakhulu, apho ukhula kancinci kancinci ngokuhamba kwexesha, umntu uqala ukuyibona impazamo awayebhaptizwe kuyo, nangona kunjalo, njengoko besitshilo ekuqaleni. isicwangciso esinobungozi, kodwa kwiimeko ezininzi kunempembelelo enkulu.
Chonga ukuba yintoni ebangele ukukhotyokiswa butywala
Kumntu ofuna ukuphuma kubukhoboka botywala, kubalulekile ukwazi ukuba sasiyintoni isizathu sokuba eze kuloo meko. Ayisosisombululo silula, kusenokubakho izizathu ezininzi ezikuncedayo ukuba uchonge eyona nto ibalulekileyo, kulo mba usapho kunye nabahlobo baya kudlala, ekufuneka behambe kancinci kancinci nangomonde omkhulu befumanisa ukuba yayiyintoni na loo meko. .
Umntu kufuneka ashiywe ukuba acinge kwaye acinge yedwa, ephendula ngokucacileyo imibuzo ebuziweyo. Kufuneka kucetyiswe ukwenza uludwe lwemibutho, olunenjongo yokulahla abo bangabonwa njengabafanelekileyo, amalungu entsapho kufuneka aqaphele imeko, azi isimo sengqondo kwaye abe novelwano nomntu.
Funa uncedo kwiingcali
Kulo naliphi na ilizwe ehlabathini kukho iingcali kwiinkalo ezigxininisiweyo ezinxulumene nale ngxaki, ezi ngcali zinokunceda ukuphucula imeko kunye nomgangatho wobomi bomntu. Ukuba kuqatshelwe ukuba kukho ukukhatywa ngokukodwa okanye ukusabela okungalunganga kwiinkqubo ezisetyenzisiweyo, kuyacetyiswa ukuba ucebise uncedo lwengcali.
Namhlanje kukho iindlela ezahlukeneyo zokunyanga olu hlobo lwe-pathology, nangona kwabanye aluthathwa njengolunjalo, kukholelwa ukuba luyinxalenye yezifo eziziwayo kwihlabathi liphela, kuba iingxaki eziguqukayo zivelisa, kunye notshintsho kwimpilo yomzimba. umntu uyayivumela ukuba ihlelwe ngolo hlobo.
Iingcali zengqondo ziyakwazi ukufunda amanqanaba ahlukeneyo akhoyo kwiinxila. Ngokusebenzisa iiparamitha ezithile, iipateni kunye neeprothokholi, banokuseka unyango olujolise kuhlobo ngalunye lwesigulana.
Yazisa usapho kunye nabahlobo
Ukuba ingxaki sele iqatshelwe, kuhle kakhulu ukwazisa intsapho kunye nabahlobo, ngenjongo yokufumana isisombululo kule ngxaki. Ikratshi kufuneka libekwe ecaleni kwaye kulungile ukukhumbula ukuba le yingxaki ethile ekufuneka isonjululwe ngokukhawuleza; Isigqibo sokwazisa malunga nesidingo sesisombululo siya kudala uvuyo oluthile kunye nokwaneliseka kubantu abaninzi apho basebenze ngokukhawuleza izenzo zokunceda.
Susa imikhondo yotywala
Xa umntu eqala unyango olulolu hlobo, kubalulekile ukulahla naluphi na uhlobo lotywala olukhoyo ekhaya. Akukhuthazwa kakhulu ukuyifihla ngaphakathi kwendlu, ekubeni umntu onengxaki unokufumaneka. Kufuneka ilahlwe, inikwe okanye ikhutshwe ngaphandle kwekhaya, oku ukwenzela ukuphepha iimeko apho ukusabela kwi-syndrome yokurhoxisa kunokusekwa.
Inkqubo inokunceda ukuqinisa izenzo, kamva umntu kuya kufuneka ajongane nobunyani bazo kwaye aziveze phambi kobunyani bakhe bokwenyani, apho bade banxulumane namaxesha apho basela iziselo ezinxilisayo. Nangona kunjalo, ngelixa isigulane sikwinqanaba lokurhoxisa, gwema naluphi na uqhagamshelwano notywala.
Zahlula kubaxumi
Enye imeko yonyango ibandakanya ukuzenzela ikheswa nokuyeka ukunxulumana nabahlobo bentsapho nezinxulumani ezisoloko zikhuthaza ukusetyenziswa kotywala. Imekobume yabasela utywala, njengoko bebizwa njalo kwamanye amazwe, ayinakuqonda ukuba umhlobo unengxaki kwaye kufuneka ayeke ukusela ngoko nangoko, aba bantu banokuba negalelo ekusileleni konyango.
Nangona kunjalo, nangona benyanzeliswa, bayasilela ukuqonda ingxaki, kuba bazifumana bekwimeko efanayo kwaye abayifaki ngaphakathi ingxaki yokwenene. Eyona nto icetyiswayo kukuba uhlukanise umntu ixesha elithile kulolu hlobo lwentlalo yoluntu, oludibana kuphela ngenjongo yokwabelana ngeziphuzo ezimbalwa, kulungile ukuba ungawamkeli okwangoku.
sela iziselo ezishushu
Inkqubo yokubuyisela icotha kwaye ngenxa yesi sizathu zonke iiseyile zotywala emzimbeni kufuneka zibekwe zodwa. Le meko ibandakanya inkuthazo ekufuneka inikwe umntu ngokusetyenziswa kweziselo ezishushu, ziya kufakwa ngokukhawuleza, ukwenzela ukuba ukulungelelaniswa kuphunyezwe xa kudalwa imikhwa emitsha.
Iziselo ezifana neti, ikofu, iijusi kunye nejusi yeziqhamo ziyacetyiswa, amanzi amaninzi kodwa usoloko uzisela ngokucothayo, uluvo kukuphelisa imvakalelo yokuxhalaba, esebenza ngokufana naleyo yenziwa ngonyango lweentshayi. Ngendlela efanayo, le nkqubo inceda ukuphucula ukuzola kunye nokulungelelanisa iingcamango.
Khangela imisebenzi
Ingozi yolu hlobo lwesigulana inokuhambelana nokubuyela kwakhona, apho ngenxa yesizathu esithile baqala ukuxhalaba ukusela utywala kwakhona. Le meko ibizwa ngokuba ziingcali njenge-syndrome yokuhoxiswa, kule meko kuyimfuneko ukuphepha ukufikelela kulo mfanekiso ngokukhuthaza isigulane ukuba senze imisebenzi abayithandayo kakhulu.
Kukho amawaka ezinto ezinokwenziwa imihla ngemihla, ngenxa yesi sizathu kubalulekile ukugcina ingqondo ixakeke kwizenzo ezikhuthaza iingcamango ezintsha. Ngenxa yoko, kumiselwa iindlela ezahlukahlukeneyo apho umntu abonwatyiswa phantse imini yonke aze azame ukungacingi ngotywala.
Imisebenzi yezemidlalo, ukufunda ulwimi, ukusombulula iipuzzle zamagama, ukudlala isixhobo, ukuchwela kunye nomsebenzi wokwakha, njl njl. Iiyure kufuneka zixakeke ngento ethile, zama kangangoko ukuphepha umabonwakude, yindlela eyingozi kakhulu yokukhuthaza ukuphinda ubuyele kwizinxila.
Umda
Ngokuthe ngcembe, usukelo luya kuphunyezwa yaye enye yeendlela zokufikelela usukelo lokungabi natywala ngokupheleleyo inxulumene nolweyiseko lwakho nolwabanye lokungabuseli utywala. Uluntu lwethu lugcina inkcubeko yotywala kwiinkulungwane, ngoko ke akunakuphepheka ukufumana abantu abanikezela isiselo naphi na.
Lixesha lokuba ujongane nengxaki kwaye uthi "HAYI", yenza isigqibo ngamandla kwaye ume ngokuqinileyo. Loo mzuzu umele ingqungquthela kwinkqubo yokuphilisa, kulapho uya kulubona ngokwenene uhlobo lwamandla kunye nendlela umntu owenziwe ngayo, khumbula ukuba isenzo eso sesokulunga kobomi bakho.
Ukudibanisa nabanye abantu
Njengenxalenye yonyango lobuchwephesha, bacebisa ukujoyina amanye amaqela kunye nabantu abanemeko efanayo, kunye nokujoyina amaqela abantu abaye baneengxaki ezifanayo zokusela utywala. I-Association of Alcoholics Anonymous, eyaziwa nge-acronym yayo njenge-AA, yintlangano efanelekileyo ethi, ngonyango lweqela, iphumelele inkqubela phambili yokulawula ukusela kwabo.
La maqela avumela ukwabelana ngamava, iziganeko, i-anecdotes engathandekiyo esebenza njengomzekelo kwabanye abantu malunga nokwazisa kunye nokuhambelana nengxaki yokwenene emele utywala. Ngendlela efanayo, kwi-Intanethi kukho izifundo kunye neziphakamiso ezingapheliyo ezinokusebenza njengenkxaso ekusombululeni le ngxaki.
Unyamezelo
Kubalulekile ukugxininisa imilinganiselo yomntu ngamnye, ukhuthaze, ukhuthaze kwaye ukuba kunokwenzeka umvuzo ngezenzo kunye neemeko apho baziva banelisekile, kwelinye icala, ukunyamezela kufuneka kuqiniswe ukuze ume uqinile kwindawo yokungaseli. utywala.
Kubantu abaninzi, bayeka njani ukusela utywala? imele inkuthazo enzima kubo, nangona kunjalo kubalulekile ukubenza baqaphele ukuba inkqubo ayinzima, funa nje uncedo kwaye uzame ukufezekisa ukunyamezela okufunekayo, ngale ndlela izibonelelo zomntu ngamnye ziya kufumaneka ezinceda ukuba uzive ungcono kwaye unyuke. ukuphuculwa kobudlelwane bosapho noluntu.
Funda ngakumbi malunga nesi sihloko ngokufunda inqaku Izizathu zokuxhomekeka ngokweemvakalelo, equlethe idatha enomdla.
Izimvo zokugqibela
Yonke imeko oyijongayo Indlela yokuyeka ukusela utywala? Oku kuthetha imeko eyahluke kakhulu, abantu ababandakanyekayo kolu hlobo lwengxaki kufuneka bahlalutywe kwaye baqondwe, amaxesha amaninzi abanye abantu abazi nokuba yintoni na ebangele ukuba baqalise ukusela utywala.
Siyathemba ukuba iingcebiso ezichazwe kweli nqaku zixabiseke kwaye zinokunceda abantu abantywiliselwe kule ngxaki. Ngalo lonke ixesha khumbula ukuba ngaphandle kwezi ntlobo zeengxaki, kuba kunzima ukuba zisonjululwe ngabanye, kwaye ukuba ubona iingxaki ezinzulu kakhulu, funa uncedo lwengcali.
